Born to Bloom

♥

By: Rebecca Copini

Two years ago, I left my hometown in The Netherlands, to finish a graduate degree, and afterward to travel the world with no intention of going back anytime soon. Leaving home was my savior. I had just come out of a long-term relationship, I pushed myself over my limits within my degree, and the pillars of my identity and values started crumbling. I lost who I was.

It is indescribable as to what you can learn from others and how it broadens your own mindset.

When I left, I knew I wanted to focus on my personal development, rediscover my values, hold my confidence again, and grow and learn. On my journey, I’ve had beautiful encounters with amazing people in breathtaking countries. I’ve had mind-expanding conversations in front of the oven with tea to keep warm, under the night sky filled with stars on tropical islands, in the middle of nowhere in a red desert with red wine in coffee cups, and during morning breakfasts in treehouses in the jungle. It is indescribable as to what you can learn from others and how it broadens your own mindset.

Going Back Home

I went back to my home country only two times– once for two months and once for just a short two weeks. Before I returned the first time, I read an article in which the author said, “Everything will be exactly how you left it.” Isn’t that frightening? Knowing that the world constantly changes and evolves, however when you go back home everything is still the same –knowing you have changed and evolved but are now coming back to the same place and people you left.

I was truly happy and grateful to see my friends and family, but I was also anxious and nervous. I felt out of place. My friends and family asked me all kinds of questions about my travel and were sweet and supportive, but I couldn’t articulate what I was thinking, what I had learned and how some of my viewpoints had changed.

A Flower in a Box

I remember talking to one of my friends who I met in Norway, and we discussed how to hold on to who you had become abroad when going back to your home country. We compared going back to outgrowing a box. We visualized that, in our minds, we put everyone we know in little boxes, like flower seeds, and when someone leaves they are taken out of the little box.

When they leave the little box and follow the road, they develop from a small seed to a beautiful flower with extraordinary colors and smells. But when they come back, the box hasn’t grown with them and they don’t fit back in it anymore. We feel like we are expected to go back into the little box.

Travel Plants Seeds

And it is difficult, you feel out of place and uncomfortable. How do you hold onto who you have become? I remember I truly struggled with this the first time I went back home, but over the course of time, I realized something. It is difficult to return to your home country, not only for you, but also for your friends and family. Where you feel like you are expected to go back and fit into the little box, they feel like they are expected to get us a new one within an instant. 

You are not the same person you were when you left, and even though you might not feel it, they do know this– but the truth is, they are also not the same person they were when you left.

Growth happens on both sides. However, sometimes the growth is not easily spotted since everything feels exactly how you left it. Talk with your friends and family, ask them questions and don’t be superficial. Your adventure is posted and seen on Instagram or Facebook, but ask them about their adventure too. Discuss your struggles with going back to your home country.

Don’t shelter the amazing flower you have become.

Even though they may not have experienced it, but they will understand. Maybe they can help you figure out what you loved about traveling, and how to incorporate that in your daily life when you return to “settle” back in your home country.

Don’t shelter the amazing flower you have become. Allow your friends and family the opportunity to get to know who you have become, and give them time to get you a new box in which you fit. In time you will feel aligned and comfortable again. 

Remember, you are born to bloom!

Born to Bloom

♥

By: Rebecca Copini

Two years ago, I left my hometown in The Netherlands, to finish a graduate degree, and afterward to travel the world with no intention of going back anytime soon. Leaving home was my savior. I had just come out of a long-term relationship, I pushed myself over my limits within my degree, and the pillars of my identity and values started crumbling. I lost who I was.

It is indescribable as to what you can learn from others and how it broadens your own mindset.

When I left, I knew I wanted to focus on my personal development, rediscover my values, hold my confidence again, and grow and learn. On my journey, I’ve had beautiful encounters with amazing people in breathtaking countries. I’ve had mind-expanding conversations in front of the oven with tea to keep warm, under the night sky filled with stars on tropical islands, in the middle of nowhere in a red desert with red wine in coffee cups, and during morning breakfasts in treehouses in the jungle. It is indescribable as to what you can learn from others and how it broadens your own mindset.

Going Back Home

I went back to my home country only two times– once for two months and once for just a short two weeks. Before I returned the first time, I read an article in which the author said, “Everything will be exactly how you left it.” Isn’t that frightening? Knowing that the world constantly changes and evolves, however when you go back home everything is still the same –knowing you have changed and evolved but are now coming back to the same place and people you left.

I was truly happy and grateful to see my friends and family, but I was also anxious and nervous. I felt out of place. My friends and family asked me all kinds of questions about my travel and were sweet and supportive, but I couldn’t articulate what I was thinking, what I had learned and how some of my viewpoints had changed.

A Flower in a Box

I remember talking to one of my friends who I met in Norway, and we discussed how to hold on to who you had become abroad when going back to your home country. We compared going back to outgrowing a box. We visualized that, in our minds, we put everyone we know in little boxes, like flower seeds, and when someone leaves they are taken out of the little box.

When they leave the little box and follow the road, they develop from a small seed to a beautiful flower with extraordinary colors and smells. But when they come back, the box hasn’t grown with them and they don’t fit back in it anymore. We feel like we are expected to go back into the little box.

Travel Plants Seeds

And it is difficult, you feel out of place and uncomfortable. How do you hold onto who you have become? I remember I truly struggled with this the first time I went back home, but over the course of time, I realized something. It is difficult to return to your home country, not only for you, but also for your friends and family. Where you feel like you are expected to go back and fit into the little box, they feel like they are expected to get us a new one within an instant. 

You are not the same person you were when you left, and even though you might not feel it, they do know this– but the truth is, they are also not the same person they were when you left.

Growth happens on both sides. However, sometimes the growth is not easily spotted since everything feels exactly how you left it. Talk with your friends and family, ask them questions and don’t be superficial. Your adventure is posted and seen on Instagram or Facebook, but ask them about their adventure too. Discuss your struggles with going back to your home country.

Don’t shelter the amazing flower you have become.

Even though they may not have experienced it, but they will understand. Maybe they can help you figure out what you loved about traveling, and how to incorporate that in your daily life when you return to “settle” back in your home country.

Don’t shelter the amazing flower you have become. Allow your friends and family the opportunity to get to know who you have become, and give them time to get you a new box in which you fit. In time you will feel aligned and comfortable again. 

Remember, you are born to bloom!

About author: Rebecca Copini

I was born in the Netherlands and grew up in a small town with my parents. When I was 19, I moved to Belgium and afterward, I lived in Norway, Australia, Vietnam, traveled in Asia and are currently living in New Zealand.

I live for human connections, unique experiences and adventures and have found those all over the world. I love becoming comfortable with the uncomfortable and question societal expectations set on me.

I want to break my own body ideals; focus on mental cognition and self-love. Practice what I believe with love and support. Less judgment, more empowerment.

Find me on instagram @rebeccacopini

About author: Rebecca Copini

I was born in the Netherlands and grew up in a small town with my parents. When I was 19, I moved to Belgium and afterward, I lived in Norway, Australia, Vietnam, traveled in Asia and are currently living in New Zealand.

I live for human connections, unique experiences and adventures and have found those all over the world. I love becoming comfortable with the uncomfortable and question societal expectations set on me.

I want to break my own body ideals; focus on mental cognition and self-love. Practice what I believe with love and support. Less judgment, more empowerment.

Find me on instagram @rebeccacopini